What do you consider the most important relationship in your life? If you answered “my husband” or “my wife,” you’re not alone. After all, we’re talking about the person you wake up next to every morning, share meals with, and fall asleep beside—day after day, for years. If you’re lucky, that routine might last the better part of a century.
Isn’t it time to take some steps toward making that relationship stronger?
That’s exactly why some wise folks came up with the idea of National Marriage Week. Every year from Feb. 7 to 14 (deliberately leading up to Valentine’s Day), this campaign promotes “awareness of the positive impact that marriages have on society.”
They call their quest a “marriage movement” and are bringing together churches, faith leaders, and “marriage champions” to help real, everyday couples strengthen their marriages when modern life stacks the odds against them. The theme of this year’s National Marriage Week is “Together With Purpose.”
The Epoch Times spoke with Arlene Pellicane, spokesperson for National Marriage Week, and asked her the big question: What does “Together With Purpose” mean?
‘Together With Purpose’
According to Pellicane, the answer is different for everyone. It begins with a couple asking if there’s something they can achieve together that they couldn’t do alone. “This purpose can look differently for different people,” she said. “Their purpose might be raising children, then grandchildren. Other couples may devote their lives to a non-profit or have a place of service that they love. … Other people may just realize, ‘my spouse makes me a better person … they bring out the best in me,’” she said.
Pellicane is the author of “Making Marriage Easier: How to Love (and Like) Your Spouse for Life.” The book offers suggestions for building a stronger, happier marriage—not through big dramatic changes, but through everyday choices rooted in biblical wisdom, humor, and simple habits. She wrote it after 25 years of marriage to her husband, James. She also hosts the weekly Happy Home podcast, is a mother of three, and has worked as an associate director for “Turning Point with David Jeremiah.” All of that experience has shaped her practical, hope-filled approach to marriage.
As a starting point, Pellicane offers four simple decisions that can make marriage easier.
1. Play by the Rules
Set shared guidelines and habits early on in the marriage. Establish these according to what a good marriage should look like, and agree on clear boundaries—what’s always a yes and what’s always a no.
Pellicane gave an example: Early in their marriage, she and her husband decided they’d always eat dinner together. “You have to eat anyway, so why not do it together?” she said. Then her husband suggested something unusual—no TV in the evenings for their first month. He said, “I don’t want to just come home, sit on the couch, and watch TV—I want to go on walks with you, ride bikes, do things together.”
“I thought, ‘That’s strange,’ but we did it,” Pellicane said. They developed the habit of saying, “Oh, it’s dinner time now. We’re going to talk, we’re not distracted.” It had become such a welcomed custom that when they visited others who watched TV during dinner, they thought, “Wow, this is really distracting.” This small habit grew into a lifelong culture of “screen-free meal times and a regular meal every day.”
Pellicane adds that if you’re traveling or work’s crazy, that’s fine—but the point is to have some regular way to connect, maybe coffee in the morning instead. Food’s a great hook because you have to eat.
2. Give Thanks Every Day
Teach yourself a habit of gratitude. Remember what’s good about your spouse and express that appreciation verbally, in writing, or through actions. This continually strengthens the “gratitude muscle” to combat complaining or taking each other for granted.
Pellicane shares that one year around Thanksgiving, her husband handed her a simple piece of paper on which he’d written something he appreciated about her every day for a week. Little notes like, “You’re so warm and welcoming when our daughter Lucy comes home from school,” or “That dinner you made was delicious,” or “You always manage to get something good on the table.”
“So, for me, the recipient, it was like, ‘Wow, you notice those things?’” Pellicane said. “That made me so happy, so thankful for him.” With only a few words on a piece of paper, her husband focused on the good things that his spouse does.
“We’re trying not to take each other for granted,” Pellicane said. “One way to do it is to speak your thanks out loud. And if you’re not very verbal, that’s OK—write it down in a little note. Text your spouse something simple like, ‘Hey, I noticed this about you. I’m so thankful you always take out the trash and I never have to ask.’ Whatever it is, just communicate that appreciation.”
3. Serve Your Spouse
Shift from “What have you done for me?” to “What can I do for you?”—asking how you can make your spouse’s life easier, communicating needs clearly, and serving even when reciprocity isn’t immediate. Look to your vows and faith for endurance.
“Don’t you like being around people that have that disposition of … ‘Oh good, you’re here. I need you to do this.’? Nobody wants to be around a person like that,” Pellicane said. Instead, ask yourself, “How would I want to be treated?” That, according to Pellicane, “fixes a lot in a marriage.”
But what if you keep cooking, listening, helping, and loving—yet sometimes it feels like you’re the only one who sees the effort? Don’t give up. Choosing the right moment to share your feelings makes a big difference: A gentle request like, ‘You know, it would mean a lot to me if you just said thank you after the meal,” is reasonable and can help your spouse see an area they’ve been neglecting.
If articulating your feelings doesn’t seem to be working, don’t lose heart. It’s then that “we go back to our vows and say, ‘Hey, this was in sickness and in health, for better or for worse, and there will be days that are better and there will be days that are worse,” Pellicane said. “And if you will hang in there in your marriage, statistically over time, it will get better.”
4. Take Fun Seriously
Intentionally prioritize fun—both through scheduled activities and a playful attitude—to recapture that beginner’s joy that often fades over time.
“I remember when we were dating, I was really goofy. I would say silly poems. I would make little raps for my husband,” Pellicane said. “Now I’m in my 50s, so now I have to think, ‘Where did that silly girl go and how can I bring her back from time to time? Sometimes it all comes down to choosing to have a fun, carefree attitude.”
Pellicane brings laughter and optimism to every conversation. Her books are easy to read—filled with effective principles and relatable stories interspersed with lighthearted moments.
To learn more about National Marriage Week or register for its free, live round-table broadcasts Feb. 7–Feb. 14, 2026, go to MarriageWeek.org. Arlene Pellicane can be reached through her website at ArlenePellicane.com.
